If Deco Drive was trying to pull off a major heist, the first person we’d send is Johnnie-U — because every time he’s on Deco — he steals the show. (Johnnie asked us to say that.) Here’s his review of “Ocean’s 8.”
Hey, folks, Johnnie-U here, dressed like a burglar because I’m gonna steal the famed Deco jewels — and it’s fitting, because I’m about to go see the new heist flick “Ocean’s 8.”
All right, now, in this movie, Sandra Bullock plays Debbie Ocean, the sister of George Clooney’s Danny from the Steven Soderbergh-directed “Ocean’s” movies. Like her brother, she is a con artist who is planning the biggest heist in history — once she gets out of prison.
The only thing is, she has to find a group of would-be criminals to help her succeed in stealing a very expensive necklace out in the open during the huge Met Gala.
Well, folks, you’d think with all the star power this movie has, it would shine bright like a diamond — but it’s overly flawed. It feels thrown together. Everything moves at lightning speed but there’s no time for character development.
The actual heist isn’t even clever or cunning. No suspenseful “we’re gonna get caught” moments, and if there was humor in the film, it fell flat or I missed it.
At least I got to steal the Deco jewel. It’s awfully pretty.
Well, folks, “Ocean’s 8” did nothing for me but steal my time, so I say forget it! I’m Johnnie-U, and this has been my movie review.
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