They say opposites attract. It’s the same deal with Billy Crystal and Tiffany Haddish. They unexpectedly become best buds in the new dramedy “Here Today,” and Deco’s interview with the two stars also happens to be here today. Like, right now.

They’re definitely not lovers.

Billy Crystal (as Charlie Berns): “I didn’t want for this to happen.”

Tiffany Haddish (as Emma Payge): “That ‘this,’ it didn’t happen. Your little frail body would not be able to handle all these groceries.”

Let’s just call them friends.

Billy Crystal and Tiffany Haddish star in “Here Today.” He’s a comedy writer starting to battle dementia, when Tiffany’s character steps up to take care of him.

Tiffany Haddish (as Emma Payge): “If you ever need my help, I’m here.”

Billy Crystal (as Charlie Berns): “I’m writing something, and I have to finish before my words run out.”

But Tiffany told Deco this isn’t a one-sided relationship.

Tiffany Haddish: “She can see that he’s going through something, which reminds her of her family and things that she’s gone through. She helps him, and they help each other. There’s a lot of empathy there, and caring and love, so it’s beautiful.”

How the two characters meet is also beautiful — beautifully hilarious.

It’s based on a real experience Billy’s friend had at a charity luncheon. The movie essentially reenacts it.

Billy Crystal: “Someone paid money to have lunch with him. It was like $22 that she paid.”

Billy Crystal (as Charlie Berns): “Twenty-two hundred dollars?! That’s fantastic!”

Tiffany Haddish (as Emma Payge): “Twenty-two dollars. It started at $20 and then it went up in 50-cent increments.”

Billy Crystal: “Then she ends up having a toxic reaction to a seafood salad. She blows up, and it gets dangerous. He has to call an ambulance. He has to go to the hospital with her.”

Billy Crystal (as Charlie Berns): “Why is your face suddenly bigger than it was before? Oh, my God. Are you allergic to seafood?!”

Tiffany Haddish (as Emma Payge): “Oh, maybe I am!”

Billy ended up turning that story into a feature-length film — one he stars in and directed, produced and co-wrote.

He’s so excited about it, he took Deco through the entire, very long, creative process.

Billy Crystal: “So then I was in Penn Station…”

We love ya, Billy, but even Tiffany is over here taking a drink break. Mood.

By the time we started chatting with Tiff…

Tiffany Haddish: “Uhhh. I’m sorry, my brain is all over the place!”

Tiffany Haddish (as Emma Payge): “I’ll take care of him.”

Anna Deavere Smith (as Dr. Vidor): “May I ask what your relationship is?”

Tiffany Haddish (as Emma Payge): “I don’t know.”

Billy Crystal (as Charlie Berns): “I don’t know.”

“Here Today” opens in theaters on Friday.

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