What do Drake, Brad Pitt, Angelina Jolie and Tom Cruise all have in common? What they wake up on top of … but this isn’t like what you buy at a regular mattress store. Alex Miranda, a mattress connoisseur of sorts, is in Miami’s Design District with the story.
Drake (rapping): “I only love my bed and my mom, I’m sorry.”
Well, now we know why.
Juan Quintero, Hästens: “We have beds for $50,000, $200,000, $400,000.”
They say Hästens makes the best mattresses in the world.
Juan Quintero: “The most recent celebrity we made a bed for was for Drake. I think it was over $400,000. It was specially customized for him. There is also Tom Cruise, Brad Pitt.”
At their new showroom, Sleep Spa, in Miami’s Design District, you can take a test drive.
Alex Miranda: “Oooh, oh, wow! All right, you know what? I think I like it firm.”
Juan Quintero: “We dim the lights for them, and we just tuck them in bed, literally.”
Yeah, they will literally lock the front door. You can sleep for 30 minutes, 45, even an hour.
Alex Miranda: “Yeah, we’ll talk later. I’m going to take a nap.”
It’s all COVID-safe, too. Just bring your PJs, or they’ll sell you some.
Alex Miranda: “Take a look at these boots! I’m obsessed, and I guess I’m already sold before I’ve even started. Oh!”
Buuuuuut, what’s all the fuss about anyway?
Juan Quintero: “Our beds will remove the static from you, but it also absorbs the moisture and the heat, and gives you a proper anatomic alignment.”
And they’re really comfy! Plus, the all-natural materials include ethically-sourced horse hair, so it’s totally cool to horse around.
Alex Miranda: “Yee-haw!”
Hästens also sells queen mattresses for as “low” as $7,000. The Vividus is not one of them.
Alex Miranda: “This is $210,000! They call it the Bugatti — oh, yeah! OK, here it is! — of mattresses.”
You might have also seen it in “Emily in Paris,” but I call this scene “Alex in Heaven.”
Alex Miranda: “I really don’t know how Drake gets up in the morning. I mean, you get into this thing, and you just sink. It puts you to sleep like that.”
Just, uh, don’t forget to set the alarm.
Alex: “Where am I? What time is it? What happened? Why am I in a store?!”
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