“RuPaul’s Drag Race” premieres Friday night with two SoFlo faces. Deco’s Alex Miranda talked with Mhi’ya Iman Le’Paige earlier this week, but now, Morphine Love Dion is taking Deco center stage. The Latina goddess is a first from Hialeah, and she told me at R House in Wynwood that she’s bringing 305 to MTV.

“RuPaul’s Drag Race” has gone Hialeah.

Morphine Love Dion (in the show): “My name is Morphine Love Dion. I am the Latina goddess of Miami, Florida.”

Morphine Love Dion: “This season is going to be very, very, very insane.”

Ya tu sabes.

Morphine Love Dion: “I’m from Hialeah. My parents are from Nicaragua, but I feel like I’m technically half Cuban.”

Alex Miranda: “Your name: Morphine. That’s a little racy, but it didn’t start off that way. You got this from Lady Gaga.”

Lady Gaga (singing): “I’m going to marry.”

Morphine Love Dion: “You know ‘Marry the Night?’ I didn’t realize it was a narcotic drug, and I just stuck with it.”

But on Season 16, you can call her one shady queen.

Morphine Love Dion: “And I’m here to heat things up!”

Alex Miranda: “Are you a mean girl?”

Morphine Love Dion: “I’m not a mean girl.”

Morphine Love Dion (in the show): “I see top four right here. You know what? I’m just kidding. I don’t. I’m sorry, babe.”

Morphine Love Dion: “It’s called the resting [expletive] face, and I suffer from it.”

Morphine Love Dion (in the show): “I don’t judge, but I’m judging.”

Morphine Love Dion (to Alex): “I could read you right now. I know that this is not your good side.”

And, for the first time ever, two Miami-Dade queens will be fighting for the title of America’s next drag superstar.

Mhi’ya Iman Le’Paige: “My name is Mhi’ya Iman Le’Paige, and it’s time to get fliptastic.”

Morphine Love Dion: “Well, first I was pissed, because I wanted to be the only one.”

Which means double the 305-isms…

Alex Miranda: “Did you bring any Miami slang?”

Morphine Love Dion: “I kept saying ‘bro’ and ‘duh’ and, like, ‘ay, pero like.’ I would say that all the time.”

Alex Miranda: “We got a ‘pero like’ on ‘Drag Race?!'”

Morphine Love Dion: “And we got a ‘pero like’ on ‘Drag Race!'”

Alex Miranda: “Yes!”

Friday nights at 8 on MTV.

Morphine Love Dion: “What I really missed was the croquetas.”

Morphine brings the house down here at R House in Wynwood, where she once taught me…

Alex Miranda: “Cut to clip right now.”

But from Hialeah to Hollywood, the City of Progress truly does make perfect.

Alex Miranda: “How proud are you of yourself?”

Morphine Love Dion: “I’ve never got this question before. I’m really proud of myself. I auditioned for the show six times. Like, I’m pinching myself. I just can’t; it’s insane.”

Well, this calls for a toast!

Morphine Love Dion: “Alex, I work here. it’s on us.”

Alex Miranda: “Oh. OK, good, ’cause I can’t really afford Veuve Clicquot.”

Morphine Love Dion: “Oh, I could tell.”

Alex Miranda and Morphine Love Dion: “Cheers!”

Morphine Love Dion: “Wait, wait, wait, wait.”

Alex Miranda: “What?”

Morphine Love Dion: “We have to do it the Miami way.”

Alex Miranda and Morphine Love Dion: “¡P’arriba, p’abajo, p’al centro, p’adentro!”

Morphine Love Dion: “And finish all of that because I’m paying for this. Thank you!”

Alex Miranda: “Oh, OK…”

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